Nightmares Part II

No matter how much I try to avoid it, I have to sleep eventually. And with sleep the nightmares creep in. Most of the time these aren't flashbacks to the war, but just whatever my sick mind can conjure up.

I'm actually kind of starting to like the nightmares. I used to be a horror movie junkie when I was a kid. As I aged, they got lame, and it seemed that nothing scared me anymore. Except my sub-conscious.

Since I quit drinking over 7 months ago, they have progressivley gotten more intense, vivid and worse. It seems that each night, my "Sub C" goes into over-drive trying to top itself from the night before.

I suppose if I were inclined enough to, I could attempt to tabulate what I dream, in an effort to write some pretty disturbing stories. The problem is, I'm not really sure if they are just "stories".

I think I have a little psycic ability, not nearly as much as in my pre-teens/pre-problem drinking days. I think a lot of drugs have dulled my senses over the past 15 years. Once in awhile though I do have pre-cognition. The thing is, I never realize it until after the event is taking place or shortly thereafter. Deja Vu? Perhaps.

Since I like to avoid certain truths, I think Someone or Something is making me face it, albiet via dreamscape. It's the only reason I think I'm not dead yet, because over the years I should be. I still have a vital purpose that I have not yet realized fully and have not accomplished.

Besides all the obvious warning sides in my external world, I've been getting warnings over the course of the past 11 years at least.

I think the Apocalypse isn't near, I think it's already here, we just don't realize it.